First and Last

Posted by kara

I’ve been feeling bittersweet about Martha growing up. Yes, I love getting out of that newborn stage. Then again, I already miss the days when she would sleep with her head on my shoulder and her mouth open. Her hands are growing from delicate to chubby. (Her feet, thighs, and cheeks are also chubbalicious.) She is old enough to hold herself together when I pick her up, so it’s not like picking up dead weight. I love picking her up after her nap. Then I look in the mirror and check out how cute she looks in my arms. So cute!

With Toshi, everything was looking ahead. A series of Firsts. We tore through the milestones and she got more and more fun and more and more hilarious. So exciting and so much to look forward to with the first child. [I’m already counting down the years until Disney World!]

Now with Martha, it’s like everything is a series of Lasts. Last newborn sleepyhead. Last time she flails her arms around uncontrollably. Last time before she learns to crawl. Last of the babyhood. I don’t *really* want to hold her back, but does she have to start solids now? Does she really have to start rolling around? (Thank goodness she doesn’t push me away yet when I hold her.) Can’t we slow down time just a little bit?

I go around saying things like, “Oh you’re my little baaaay-bee!” “Look how cute your little chubby feet are!” “Let’s cuddle a little longer, baby!” No wonder why Toshi sometimes pretends to be a baby and plays on the playmat. Yeah, I’m sure I’m going to end up giving both my girls complexes. It just never ceases to amaze me how quickly the first 2 years go by. (Or is it always like this?! Oh dear.)

Anyway, since I’m obviously going to have baby-nostalgia, I need my friends to have no judgment if I get overly affectionate and smother their babies with kisses. And no weird looks when I squeeze the babies’ chubby thighs… Just a warning. (Please let me still hold your babies.)

Paul and his girls.